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How to create your sex positive community

Free Checklist: Essential Tips to Build Your Sex Positive Community💋📝

Creating a sex-positive community is a powerful way to foster a culture of consent, body celebration, and sexual freedom. Such communities provide a space where people can openly explore their sexuality, express their desires, and connect with others who share similar values. Here's a guide to help you build your own sex-positive community.

What is a Sex-Positive Community?

A sex-positive community is one where members "come out as sexual beings," acknowledging their bodies, sex, and pleasure as integral parts of life. These communities are founded on principles of consent, respect, and inclusivity. They are places where individuals can feel safe to explore their sexuality without judgment, engage in open conversations about sex, and celebrate the diversity of sexual expression.

What a Sex-Positive Community is Not

It's important to clarify that sex-positive communities are not about:

Nudity all the time: Comfort is key, and nudity should never be a requirement, especially if it makes someone uncomfortable.
Non-consensual touching or comments: Consent is the foundation of any interaction within a sex-positive space.
Pressuring members to have more sex: Sex positivity does not equate to having frequent sex. It's about having the freedom to choose when, how, and with whom to engage in sexual activities.
Using sex as therapy: While sex can be a healing experience, it should not replace professional therapy for psychological issues. Sex is complex and carries its own set of emotional dynamics.

A healthy sex-positive community encourages open dialogue about boundaries, consent, and mutual respect. It is a space where members can explore their sexual identities safely and with the support of others who respect their limits.

Free Checklist: Essential Tips to Build Your Sex Positive Community💋📝

Examples of Sex-Positive Communities

There are numerous sex-positive communities around the world, each with its own unique culture and practices. Here are a few notable ones:

Vermilion (Facebook Group): A vibrant community that emphasizes consent, gentle presence, and the celebration of pleasure. Members share experiences, support each other's journeys, and foster a culture of respect and kindness. This one I can personally vouch for and is a lovely space to dip your toe into sex positivity.
Bonobo Network (San Francisco): This community offers both real-world and virtual events where people can learn about sexuality, pleasure, and relationships. It is known for its commitment to inclusivity, consent, and creating supportive environments.
The Parallel Universe (Europe): Based in Vienna, this community organizes festivals, workshops, and events that prioritize safer sex practices, consent, and body positivity. It’s a space to explore desires, connection, and artistic expression in a safe, inclusive environment.
Crossbreed (London): A sex-positive rave and community space that champions inclusivity, particularly for marginalized queer individuals. Crossbreed is known for its strong emphasis on consent and creating a safe space for all attendees.

Want to take the first steps towards YOUR sex++ safe space? Download my free checklist below.

Free Checklist: Essential Tips to Build Your Sex Positive Community💋📝

The American Context: Integrating Sexual Freedom

In the United States, sex-positive communities are relatively young, especially when considering the broader historical context of sexual freedom. The sex positive rhetoric in America can still feel like participating in or even discussing such communities is akin to illicit behavior. This sense of secrecy can prevent the full integration of sexual freedom into daily life. However, as these communities grow and become more visible, they are gradually shifting perceptions and helping individuals embrace their sexual identities more openly.

Building Your Own Sex-Positive Community

To build a successful sex-positive community, consider the following steps:

Establish Clear Values: Define your community's principles, such as consent, respect, and inclusivity. Ensure these values are communicated clearly to all members.
Create Safe Spaces: Whether physical or virtual, your community spaces should prioritize safety and comfort for all members. This includes clear guidelines on behavior, confidentiality, and consent.
Promote Inclusivity: Welcome individuals of all sexual orientations, gender identities, and relationship structures. A diverse community enriches the experience for everyone.
Educate and Empower: Offer workshops, discussions, and resources on topics like consent, sexual health, and communication. Empower members with knowledge and tools to navigate their sexuality safely.
Foster Connection: Encourage open dialogue, shared experiences, and mutual support. Building strong connections between members strengthens the community and promotes a culture of empathy and understanding.

By following these guidelines, you can create a sex-positive community that not only celebrates sexual freedom but also fosters a deeper understanding and respect for all members' sexual identities.

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